The Christmas Spirit

Every year, I wonder when I'll feel the Christmas spirit. That joyful, love of humanity, red & green glow of a feeling that comes over you during the holiday season. Will it be December 15th? Will it be earlier? Will it come at all?

First I have to find my Christmas pins & put them on my coat. I've had a wreath pin with a real bell in it since I was 8 years old. Have collected many more since then, but that's my favorite. The problem is I only find them on about Dec 21th and its too late.

I had to decorate my tree by myself this year---but still felt like a kid, putting up the tree. Drove myself dizzy walking around the tree with the strand of lights, but that's ok, it looks beautiful. We have a set of lights that have 27 different patterns. When a favorite came on (fading blinking), I said to Jake how beautiful it was. He said, "yes Mom, it looks the same as it does every year". Well then I guess it looks beautiful every year. I bought three teddy bear decorations years ago at a half price sale at Lord & Taylor's. Margie, Julie, Norman I call them. I've kept my Mom's Christmas balls, none of them match.... a skinny green cylinder, red balls with inlets for the lights to reflect off of, and green glittery, fuzzy balls. I hadn't put them up lately because they didn't match, but this year I did. I look at them in the glow of the light and see my past, present and future, all in the blink of an eye.

Memories of the Christmas spirit are great. It really all begins with the Charlie Brown Christmas special --after Linus gives his speech on the true meaning of Christmas and they all shout: MERRY CHRISTMAS CHARLIE BROWN.............and break in to song......."Wu uh, uhhhh o uh....uhhh..uuuhhh, [deep breathe, black mouths open wide--ever wonder why they have no teeth?]. That's when I get the Christmas spirit.